Helping Teens Respond to Rejection

Nobody likes to be *Rejected*!

The teen years are an incredibly awkward time, physically, emotionally and relationally. A common theme that comes up often in my work with teens is *REJECTION.* Rejection from colleges, rejection from unrequited love, rejection from friend groups, rejection from sports teams...

Rejection is everywhere for teens. And if you're already feeling badly about yourself, it can increase one's rejection of self-love which is so important to healthy development.

helping teens respond to rejection

My Recent Rejection Story

Even as adults, we experience rejection. As a therapist, I am not ethically able to request, solicit, or respond to reviews due to the confidential nature of my professional relationship with the clients and families I serve.

That being said, review sites exist galore on the web- none of which I have personally initiated. These sites comb the web, and other specialty directories, for professionals' information and often report misinformation (like old office addresses, etc.)

As such, I try to google my business about once a quarter to make sure these directories have the correct information and guess what...


I was of course upset initially (I am human after all) and it definitely got stuck in my head trash for a moment because the kciker was- there was no other comments/indicators checked off. It was just the 1-star. I hadn't received any actionable feedback about what they didn't like.

What does this have to do with teen rejection?

This experience made me think about the way my teens deal with rejection. They often don't receive the information they need to know how others experienced them, and if it is something they need to change or clarify with that person. Teens, especially teen girls, tend to ice out the teen they are rejecting, rather than have direct, helpful conversations with that person.

In an effort to help teens deal with rejection, I'm sharing the strategies I used that they can too.

Change Your Perspective

"I believe that rejection is a blessing because it's the universe's way of telling you that there's something better out there." ~ Michelle Phan

Sometimes rejection is not personal. People have different interests, desires, and values. Everyone is not your cup of tea, so why would you expect to be everyone else's? 

If you can view that person's rejection as a way of helping you on your greatness- it can help you feel better about the situation.

Perhaps not getting into that college will allow you the time to save more money for the following year.

Being dumped means you can now start the healing process so you are ready to receive the love you deserve from an even better partner.

Getting a 1-star review means you are a real person, who can't please everyone.

You Know You're a Rock Star- So Keep on Rockin'!

Want even more positive influences in your teen's life? Teen Girls Therapy Group is a weekly space where your teen girl can connect with others dealing with anxiety, depression, or low self-esteem. By talking and learning together, they learn to feel better about the relationships they have with themselves and others.

Apply for a spot now by calling 203-228-8971 or completing the contact form here.

Mallory Grimste, LCSW - Teen Therapist

Mental Health Counseling for Anxious Tweens, Teens, and Young Adults | Woodbridge, CT